Why is it???

Why is it that every time I decide that this is the week I will be giving up snacks, and anything that is not healthy for me to be putting in my body, I find myself up at 11pm in the kitchen baking chocolate chip cookies?

Day at the park

Lilyann enjoyed the new feeling of walking and playing in the green grass. She found dandelions, and examined them.
We went for a jog around the track, go Lilyann, go!!!
Miranda brought her Pupcake with her. She absolutely loves taking her to the park for walks!
Whee! Lilyann's first time at the playground, with the help of big sister!
Spring is in bloom, and it's been so great to get outside with the girls! Stay tuned for more spring fun!!!

My sweet little lamb

No, I don't normally torture my children like this. I thought it would be so cute to dress Lilyann up as a little lamb. She didn't think it was so cute. Poor baby. I guess I'll just have to get a real lamb for the pasture.

Here is an update on Lilyann:

She still loves being carried in the carrier, but will still walk up to other adults wanting to be picked up if we put her down.
She is eating independently, even with a spoon, but for attachment reasons, we are continuing to feed her both bottle (us holding it), and spoon feeding her ourselves.
She still loves to eat...anything! And she still cries and screams when we say "all done".
She is a litte lover. Tonight when we were going through our bedtime routine, I was holding her in a cradle position singing to her, with soft music playing in the background, and a soft light on. She puckered her lips and made this sound "mmmmwwwaaaa". That's her kissing sound. She proceeded to give me 5 kisses in a row, all on her own, not prompted by me.
She is using baby sign language like crazy. She now signs "thank you" all the time. She is using so many of the signs we've taught her, that she has surpassed my ability to come up with new signs to teach her! (I better get my book out).
She is saying many words on her own as well.
She loves shoes, and even if she is just toddling around the house in her big cloth diaper, she brings me her shoes to put on her, (after she tries to put them on herself).
She is just now starting to hold baby dolls, and she will hug and rock them, it's precious!!
She is also finally able to touch stuffed animals. She never liked anything but hard toys before, which was common among the other babies adopted in our travel group.
She loves markers and crayons, and likes to imitate her big sister, and she is scribbling on paper, but mostly she likes to just walk around the house with one in her hand.
She is developing so well, and is starting to be able to play with Miranda a little more each day, which is always so fun to watch.
I am blessed.

Uugghh!

This is the first week we have been trying very hard to keep Lilyann at our side at all times. She loves being held, so that helps. At home we are even trying to hold her in the hip carrier at times, which she loves.

Thankfully we aren't dealing with serious behaviors or tantrums, just trying to help her to know more and more that we are her parents, her caregivers, the ones she needs to trust to meet her needs.

Yesterday was Miranda's homeschool co-op day. This is a monthly thing. I decided to take the hip carrier with me, and keep her in the full 3 hrs. if possible. It worked great until the last hour. We were sitting in Miranda's painting class, and Lilyann started to get squirmy, and she needed out. I decided to let her out to sit on my lap, and stand beside me. I was impressed that she stood beside me, keeping one hand on my leg for quite awhile, choosing not to venture too far from me. A very nice lady approached us, and began talking to me. I placed Lilyann back up on my lap. She was asking about China, and what it was like, and admiring Lilyann. She walked away to help a student, and then 5 min. later she returned, and said "Come with me", and literally scooped Lilyann right up off my knee and walked away with her! Okay, here is where I am supposed to say something, and explain that we are working on safe boundaries with her, and that I really can't allow other people to hold her for awhile. But, I was too dumbfounded, and couldn't believe that the one time I take her out of the carrier, she is picked up by a virtual stranger and taken across the room. Finally, after the shock had worn off some, I stood up, and waved at my baby and called her name. She then reached out for me, and wanted to come back to me. The woman brought her back, and sort of abruptly handed her over saying "She was just fine, until you called her name!" This was not said in a rude way, because this person is really just a sweet lady, that had no idea what is going on with us. People honestly just don't understand, often times even when you try to describe what is going on with your adopted child, and why you are handling things the way you are. So, situations like this can be really awkward! Here's hoping we can keep her in the carrier with us tomorrow at church!

Oprah

I have been seeing so many blog posts on Oprah lately, that I felt I should post my thoughts. Many people have a clip of what Oprah is saying these days about the newest campaign she is running, so it is easy to find. It really is a huge deal, mainly because so many people love her, and look up to her.

I heard Oprah say that she was a christian on her show just the other day. She really doesn't know the Word of God though, or she wouldn't be teaching what she is. There are not many paths to God. The Bible clearly states that there is only one way to God, through His son Jesus Christ. I have seen people commenting that they feel so many christians are attacking or condemning her. It has nothing to do with condemning others, or not being tolerant of others, but what christians are speaking out about is that Oprah is stating that she is a christian, then preaching false doctrine that seems so wonderful. This is exactly what the Bible warns against. People can so easily be led astray, and it can often be masked in wonderful, feel good ways. This is what is happening with the whole Oprah thing. I will continue to pray for her, as well as pray that more and more people will see that this is not the truth of christianity.

Sweet babies, attachment, and more...

Isn't she darling?? I can't believe she's mine!! I just love watching her sleep, she looks so peaceful. Lilyann is doing so well, and she loves hugs, giving kisses, cuddling and laughing. Tonight I had her laughing so hard, she was falling over backwards!

I want to keep things real, though, and explain that even with adopting a very young child, there are issues. Lately the main issue we are having fall under the umbrella of bonding/attachment. Since having adopted an older child from russia several years ago, I found myself right in the middle of the world of attachment disorder. I ended up learning so much about attachment and trauma issues in children, while living with it, that it became a huge part of my life. If I ran into a person that had no idea what I was talking about, I was often surprised, because it was so much a part of my life, that it seemed the norm. But, the fact is, the general public has no idea what attachment/bonding issues are.

Our gotcha day/family day in China was picture perfect. I was handed over this beautiful sleeping angel, much like the photo above (she's just a bit older there). She slept through many of the other babies death defying screams as they were handed over to their parents, or perfect strangers in their eyes. When Lilyann finally awoke, she was curious, and there was no fear. She was content with us. This made things easy for us, but I knew that this was not a really good thing. When we returned home, we were determined to keep her with us exclusively, and to not even allow others to hold her, which is something that is recommended for those adopting little ones her age. Well, once home, this seemed impossible. Or, maybe we just didn't have it in us to tell all of our friends and family that they couldn't hold her, or feed her. It seemed too complicated to explain. So, we allowed people to hold her, and she was fine with that. She began to look a bit more uncomfortable with it, which is a good sign, but after she began walking, she would walk up to anyone, arms up, looking to be held. We finally realized this is much more serious than we thought. She is just so friendly, and comfortable in the arms of almost anyone. So, now, almost 6 months later, we are getting serious about the fact that we really cannot allow everyone to hold her. She needs to learn safe boundaries. She needs to learn that we are the ones that meet her needs. Today was the first day that I began speaking out to people, and it wasn't easy, and I felt bad. These unsuspecting people just see a cute little girl that wants to be held, so they willingly pick her up. I still need to stand my ground on this, and I have no idea how long it will take until she will fully understand that every stranger around her is not a caregiver, or someone that can comfort her. It will be a process!

The other update is that our foster adopt social worker called last week about a little boy. We were not expecting this, because she still needed to finish some paperwork on us, and we thought it would be months before any children came into the picture. He sounds precious. He was a preemie also! He is somewhat medically fragile, and has been in a hospital setting most of his young life. We prayed about it and realized that this is still too soon. Lilyann needs more time. I was very tempted to get more information on this little guy, but I didn't want to waste their time, when a family could be found faster. We believe he will find a wonderful family soon. A couple of weeks before that, I was approached by a friend at work who knows of another little baby boy who is half chinese and in need of an adoptive family! That was shocking because there are not many asians in our area. We were told that when his case is complete we may be contacted. I have no idea if that will ever happen. My heart is open, and just like when we were in the middle of the process of waiting for the right waiting child referral (we had to turn down 2), we knew that we would know when we felt peace. So, again, when that peace comes, we will know it is the right time for another child to enter our family.

Blessings!

Isn't it cute??????

This is my newest cloth diaper for Lilyann. Isn't it adorable? We have now been cloth diapering for a couple months. It did take some learning, some messes, and some getting used to, but it is actually very easy!!! This is probably the last cloth diaper I will buy for quite some time. I am not one of those people that is totally addicted to purchasing tons of cloth diapers like so many people are now. There is even a website where people swap and sell cloth diapers and it is huge. I met one of these people at the adoption retreat I went to! She fully admitted that she spends much too much time on that website and that she has spent $33.00 on one single diaper! She and I had a nice little chat, and the other moms around us wanted to learn more about cloth diapering. I definately would never spend that much on a diaper, as one of the reasons I went into this was to save money! I know that over the next year, it will save us quite a bit! If you are interested in cloth diapering, there are hundreds of websites that sell them. I just spent some time comparing prices, and talking to some people that were doing it already. It has been a fun new adventure!

We were showered!!

On Sunday, some of our church family had a shower for us. It was a great blessing! This lady is the one who put it on, and she served an amazing Chinese feast of all things delicious, and also showered the girls with gifts. She is multi-talented, and also made the cutest chinese lantern quilt pictured below. I know Lilyann and I will cherish it for a very long time! It was a fun afternoon. Here are some pictures from there, as well as Lilyann sitting in the middle of all her cute new clothes, she will be one well dressed little girl.





We also got a call from the state adoption social worker today, (remember, we are foster licensed too)! She had some interesting info, and a situation for us to consider....check back for more!

Lot's has been happening here...so I thought I'd bring ya all up to date! First of all, the weekend before last, Dalyn and I spent two glorious days here:

We were on an adoptive mom's retreat up in the mountains, and it snowed the entire weekend! It was beautiful! Here is what we were looking at all weekend:

It was a wonderful time of encouragement, fellowship, and good food! The owners were a sweet christian couple who spent 20 yrs building this place, for the purposes of providing a sanctuary to those doing God's work. The adoptive mom's we met came from all walks of life, young and old. Some were new to adoption, some were fostering to adopt, some had adopted domestically, some internationally, and some from all over the world. Some were there speaking the truth about what they had gone through with older child adoptions, which was such a good thing. Some of the moms were really hurting, others were there to offer encouragement, and to share in the joys of adoption. The Lord knew all of the people He would bring together there that weekend, and it worked out beautifully. It was such a blessing. I am even more inspired to continue to keep my heart open to adoption, and bringing more of the children God has for us, home.

Then, this weekend, we were blessed yet again! I will save that for the next post since it is getting quite late, so check back soon!